Half Birthday

We have finally reached the half birthday mark. This month has been full of milestones. He is rolling everywhere and is completely fascinated with his feet. He will work and work until just ONE sock is off so he can get at his toes. It is so sweet at he only wants one off. The minute I put him down he has his feet in his face. I love that even in his pajamas he is still looking for them, and is still a little confused that at night his feet disappear and he can't get booties off.

Along with his feet his is also obsessed with his tongue. Half of our little photo shoot was like the picture above. All tongue and slobber. I have done my weight in laundry with all the bibs he goes thru. I'm told that with all the spit and snot a tooth should be coming soon. Nothing yet, but his gums are really white and tender. To bad all your teeth don't come in all at once. It would make the next 18 months so much easier. ;)  

We have started eating. Well sort of, Lincoln is tolerating the baby oatmeal. It took about a week and a half for him to stop spitting it out at me. We tried the Rice cereal first and he gagged through the whole experience. I tasted it and I don't blame him. I kinda gagged too. I don't know if it was the taste or the fact that it was my breast milk... either way it was totally weird.

As of this week he has started to sit up. It is still just a few minutes at a time when the round butt hits him and he falls and flips onto his stomach, then he looks at me and I know he's thinking " what the hell just happened?". I love that things are really starting to click. He has a new interest in his toys. I guess they look brand new at this upright angle.

Lincoln's personality is finally coming out, and so far he is awesome... He has such a sweet disposition and always has a smile on his face. He is a little controlling with me sometimes. He does not like me to talk when I am breastfeeding him. Silly boy

 I am completely amazed on how fast the time is going. Pre Lincoln, 6 months would have taken forever. Post Lincoln, I blinked and it was over. Is this how adventure is going to go? I pray everyday that I am able to do my duty as his mother to guide him to become the man he is meant to be, with a warm compassionate loving heart.

5 Months

 It's amazing how much can happen in just one month. Mostly good things, but unfortunately some bad. We got to enjoy Lincoln's first Christmas and New Years. First one down and many more to come. Here are some highlights from the holidays.

 Our sweet boy has hit some major milestones this month.We have officially become mobile. He's rolling all over the place.  He ended up on our wood floors the other day and started freaking out. 

He is talking up a storm. I absolutely love to hear his babbling conversations. I would love to know what he is thinking. 

He has found his feet and is totally fascinated. It is making diaper changing a challenge. 

The biggest milestone has been that he is sleeping all night in his own room. Yes I said all night. Which is amazing for mommy and daddy. It's crazy how much more productive I am with at least 6 hours of straight sleep. I still really miss him in the room, and still check the video monitor at least 5 times a night. We are currently working on taking naps in his own bed, instead of in mommy's arms. 

Next month we introduce foods..... stay tuned... this is going to be fun

A Slap in the face + Answered Prayer = Unexpected Blessing

Sometimes it's weird when your prayers are answered. I have prayed and prayed for a way to stay home with Lincoln. Well God heard me and answered. I did not think it would be by getting me fired, but what can you do. Not like you can argue with God. When he wants you to go one way, sometimes he has a way for forcing you in that direction. Even if you are kicking and screaming. The Lord does work in mysterious ways.

Today was my last day at a job that I have loved for more than 9 years.  6 months shy of my 10 year anniversary a mistake sealed my fate. I have no hard feelings for the HR people and managers that made the decision. They were just doing their job. So I'd like to send a BIG thank you to the hospital system that I spent most of my waking hours at for giving me the opportunity to be a stay at home mom. I just wish I could have left on my own terms not theirs.  It's a decision I have been thinking about, but would have never had the cojones to make such a big change on my own.

Oh well, I'll just add it to my big book of life experiences and move on.  I had the opportunity  to meet some really wonderful people and work along side some amazing docs, nurses, techs, and pa's. The list can really go on forever. It's really bitter sweet because on one hand in an odd way I did ask for this. I will not get my going away party or be sent off with well wishes. I will not be recognized for all the good work I did. I will only be remembered for the one big goof up.

I am not going to let this break me. If anything I will be stronger and more cautious of the decisions I make. There are many great people that got fired before they went on to be amazing. Walt Disney was let go because he was not creative enough and JK Rowling was fired because she spent her days thinking about a wizard boy.

So I am not going to think of myself as a total failure. The best is yet to come. Y'all just wait and see.

Adventures in Breastfeeding and Dog Hair

4 Months ago we were thrown into parenthood. Some days I still can't believe I'm a  mommy. It's the scariest and most amazing thing I have ever experienced. I look at this sweet old soul and all I can think is "mine" and I fall in love all over again.

In these 4 short months I have learned so much about myself.
I've learned....

• How I can totally function with very very little sleep.  I have only had a few zombie moments where I got caught staring at the wall at work. 
• I can be a working mom. In the beginning I did not think I was going to be able to do it. It's still very hard to leave him everyday and it gets harder as the weeks go on. I live for the weekends. I really miss all the time we had together, all the wonderful naps and the feeling of not being rushed. I am suffering from something a fellow working mom Kelly calls "mommy guilt". I feel guilty every time I have to leave him even thought I know I have to work to support him. 
• Pumping at work is the pits. On the bright side I do get a 20 minute break every 3 hours. The down fall is that  I get a lot of time to think and it kinda makes me feel lonely. Again "mommy guilt" comes into play. This is time I could be bonding with my boy. 
• Breastfeeding is still hard. I know it is supposed the most natural thing in the world, but we are still trying to get the hang of it. Most of the time it works out great and then there are the days it seems like his is just playing around. 
• Dog hair sticks to everything... I find it everywhere. All over Lincoln, his bag, his toys his cloths, even my pumping stuff has evidence of Frankie on it. No matter how much I clean and vacuum, it just keeps spreading. 

Enough about me, now on to the boy.

Lincoln has grown so much. He is finally out of the newborn cloths and diapers. As of last week my sweet 5 pound baby is now 13 pounds. I can't believe how big he is getting.

 I love that everyday he learns something new. He rolled over for the first time this month, and like a good mom I tried to get it on video and totally screwed it up. I did get a really blurry picture of him on his side. 

He pees on everything and I think he finds it humorous. Nothing is safe. It's a good day when I show up for work with out some sort of bodily fluid on me. To be honest that has not happened as of yet ;). Breast milk or pee it seems like I am always covered in it. From what I hear from other moms with boys it does not get any better.  I'm going to have a lot of bathroom cleaning time in my future. 

We had our fist battle with antibiotics. That pink mess is awful. Why is it flavored bubble gum? He has no idea what bubble gum tastes like, but now he is going to hate it because it will taste like medicine. My poor boy had ear infections in both ears. 

He is really beginning to play. I think he is going to be a kid who can play by his self or with friends. He loves his lion king play mat and sometime he cries and freaks out until we put him down so he can play on it.

He loves watching tv. We will sit him up in his bumbo and he will sit there and just watch the screen and play with his toys or if he is on his mat he will turn on his side so he can see.

His first christmas was a time that I will never forget. (The key to opening presents again as an adult is to have a kid.) I have a truly amazing family that surrounds us with so much love. Not to mention they spoil him rotten. 

These first 4 months have absolutely flown by, and I can't wait to see what is to come. 

Shit happens....

Shit Happens and you're having a PREEMIE 

That is the first thing my doctor said to me when my water broke two months early... 

Saturday,  July 28, 2012 was the scariest day of my life. At 7 months pregnant I woke to find my sheets wet. Of course the first thing I thought was "did I just pee myself", because that is a normal pregnancy thing.. right?? it never happened to me before, but you never know.  My husband and I made it to the hospital around 5:30 am on the request of my ob after a quick phone call saying "just come in and we will check you out". After being informed by the wonderful nurse that was taking care of me that I was not leaving the hospital with out having the baby. She was like "oh baby you are not going anywhere".  I had no idea that I would be staying for a MONTH... 

So we moved into the Methodist Hospital, with rovolving nurses and doctor of all kinds. Some for me, but most for the sweet little over achiever that decided he wanted to come out early.

Now we wait.... and wait.... and wait...we even had a countdown put up in the room.

 August the 15 is a day I will never forget. I was finally 34 weeks and at this point they tell us  it is more dangerous to leave him in then it is to bring him into this world. The adopted doctor Dr. hardy (my doc had a vacation planned, but i don't hold that against her. We all could use a vacation) said it was time to start the induction. At 4:30 am we started the process. They hit me with everything that they could, but my body was still not ready. So after 21 hours in labor that was going no where it was decided that I was going to have a c-section. Which was not in my birth plan, but really none of this was so we went for it, and you know what he still did not want to come out. They had to use the suction so he came out looking like Beldar from the cone heads, but it was the most beautiful cone head that I ever did see. At 6:06 pm we became parents and our world was forever changed. I now know what I was put on the earth for. This little person is going to need and love us.

 Things were a little touch and go for a little while. Some breathing and weight gain problems. We had to leave him at the hospital, which was by far the hardest thing we have ever had to face. I remember the ride home from the hospital was the longest ever. All I wanted to do was turn around and go back to the hospital.  As we pulled into our street it was obvious that we were missing someone. Jarrod and I just cried together in the car as we rounded the corner to our house.

Now flash forward 12 weeks and we are all doing great. Life as parents is both scary and wonderful at the same time. Our sweet little boy is now 12 pounds and going strong. I can't believe he has been with us for only 3 months. The minute he was born time started to speed up and it has not stopped since. I am truly loving being a mama, and I have turned into the parent that shows everyone pictures. Even if they don't want to look.

I cannot imagine my life without Lincoln in it. He is an absolute blessing!! All the dirty diapers and sleepless night are worth it. He has changed our world.